


Fragile Hearts

by aesthetic_ouma



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: F/F, Heavy Angst, M/M, Multi, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Virtual Reality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-07-21
Packaged: 2020-05-29 15:54:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19403563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aesthetic_ouma/pseuds/aesthetic_ouma
Summary: They didn't know their love was fragile until a simple mistake broke it.They didn't know that one of them would murder.They didn't know that they couldn't live without the other.They didn't know it would be this way.OR: Kaede Akamatsu and Kokichi Ouma are twins, but only tell everyone else after the simulation is over.





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

She didn't know that they could break so easily. But she's trying to make things right again. She didn't know that it would be so hard, though.

* * *

_"Piano Freak!"_

_"Clutz!"_

_"Blondes are called dumb for a reason, I guess.."_

_"Weirdo.."_

_"What an idiot.."_

_Just smile and nod, Kaede, just smile and nod; pretend that they're right, even though you know that you aren't; don't let them get to you; don't let them know just how much their words hurt; all they want is a reaction._

That's what I used to tell myself as a child. I was thoroughly convinced that it was the only way to get them to stop. I figured that they'd eventually grow tired of using me as a punching bag. But they didn't. 

It was.. At my fifth birthday, I think, that I discovered that I had a twin brother - according to my mother, we were separated at birth, and she recently attained custody of him again. She didn't tell me much - only that he was being mistreated; apparently, she had reached out to the courts and asked them if she could have him back. She had only managed to keep me. 

After they had said yes, she had proceeded to tell me that he was right outside of our house, boxes by his side. 

I can't explain how excited I was. I'd always wished for a brother or sister so that I wasn't always lonely; had I have known that I had a separated twin beforehand, however, I probably would have ran away to find them.

The joy I felt as I reached for the handle with my tiny hands, fingers grasping it tightly as I pulled it carelessly. I remember the shock I felt as I saw the ombre-haired male staring at me with fear in his eyes. I remember him sobbing.

Our first interaction was a mess, honestly. Both of us crying and attempting to comfort our mother as she pleaded for forgiveness, which we both expressed with hugs and cheek-kisses.

"K-Kaede.. Akamatsu.." He murmured, reading the name etched onto my schoolbag with shimmering eyes. My mother noticed the fondness in his tone as he pronounced 'Akamatsu'. She decided to legally get his name changed to Akamatsu.

I don't remember how long it took for her to do that.

It was at about that time in which she removed me from my current school and into a new one. One for gifted children.

She also enrolled the now Kokichi Akamatsu, my twin, into the school alongside me. Suprisingly, we got accepted. Our mother was thrilled, taking us out into the town to treat us. We bonded with Kokichi a lot that day.

* * *

_"K-Kae-chan, I found it!" Kokichi cried out to his twin sister, a small smile on his face._

_"Found what, 'Kichi?" She smiled serenly as she snuggled up to her brother, who had taken his place besides her._

_"T-That Danganronpa book Momota-kun always talks about!" His eyes stared at the cover enthusiastically._

_Her eyes held nothing but hatred and loathing as she stared at it, too._

_They had signed up for Danganronpa V3 not even a week later._

We were stupid to think that we'd be okay.

I was stupid to allow my younger twin to get an audition time for us.

The results had come out, and my heart fell to my feet.

' **Kaede Akamatsu**

**Kokichi Akamatsu**

**Shuichi Saihara**

**Kaito Momota**

**Angie Yonaga**

**Tenko Chabashira**

**Himiko Yumeno**

**Miu Iruma**

**Kirumi Tojo**

**Rantaro Amami**

**Korekiyo Shinguji**

**Maki Harukawa**

**Tsumugi Shirogane**

**Gonta Gokuhara**

**Ryoma Hoshi**

**K1-B0** '

I wanted them to say 'no'..

.. But they said 'yes'.

Despair.

* * *

_I killed someone that day. I was lucky that this was only a game. I killed a poor, defenseless man who probably could have prevented much more than I had ever hoped to._

_Something inside of me snapped that day. I felt like absolute crap._

_I left Kokichi alone in that game. All because I had tried to save everyone else._

_I saw the way his face fell, shadows cast over his eyes as he screamed, attacking Monokuma with a whirlwind of insults and torturous words. I saw the way he looked at me in absolute fear and agony, just like he had when we first met. I remembered our promise and couldn't hold back my tears._

_"I'M SORRY, KICHI! I'M SORRY!" I wailed as I felt my throat collapsing in on itself, my body becoming limp. It's almost like a rag doll being thrown away as it no longer possesses the ability to move with emotional cause._

_It no longer becomes fun._

_Something within me died that day, my love for my twin brother always remaining._

* * *

"Kaede-chan, you must eat. I insist on it. Kokichi-kun wishes to see you, as well."

I gulped down my nerves at the sound of that name. Kokichi hadn't seen me since he'd awoken. He hadn't been aware that this was all one big game for us to watch. I hadn't watched it at all.

I hadn't wanted to see the results of what I'd put my brother through.

"I-I'll come out soon, promise.." I could hear Tojo about to knock, but the maid had slowly relented, opting to sigh and walk away with gentle steps.

Once I'd known the coast was clear, I gently opened my door and left my room.

* * *

I arrived at the canteen soon after, everyone staring at me in shock or delight. I can't imagine how horrible I must have looked. I couldn't fathom anything.

But that changed the moment I heard a small, hoarse cry of my name, someone slowly limping towards me and falling onto me. I felt the tears soaking my vest as much as I could feel my own rolling down my cheeks.

"Kichi..?" I murmured, feeling a hesitant nod in return. I smiled slightly, kissing his head gently.

"K-Kae-chan.. I-I c-can't walk o-on my own.. M-M-My death d-did a l-l-lot o-of damage to m-my body.."

That made me freeze.

"... Who in the ever-loving WHAT murdered Kokichi?"

I saw everyone tense up at my question, but especially Momota - he shuffled nervously before hesitantly waving his hand in the air. I almost stomped over to him immediately, wanting to scream at him, but a small grip on my vest told me otherwise.

Shaking his head, Kichi murmured, "Don't."

"It was all part of a master plan to lure the mastermind outta hidin'.. I didn't exactly wanna kill 'im, but it was our only shot, yknow?" I could feel the fear in his voice as he shrunk into his seat, my own hate melting away like ice on a hot summers day.

His next words were something I honestly felt I could relate to, "After all..can't be a hero if you've murdered one of the people you've gotta protect."

* * *

"Kae-chan.. And I-I's.. relationship..?" Kokichi murmured hesitantly as I sat besides him, causing a yawn to escape my mouth.

I ignored the replies that sounded at my own comment, "We're twins, just fraternal."


	2. Slowly but Steadily

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi is recovering slowly but surely, and it's not always an uphill climb..
> 
> Meanwhile, Kaede struggles to find a light, in her world of darkness, that isn't Kokichi..

* * *

Do you reckon it's always so hard to recover? Is it always so traumatising? Does it always take control of your body and make your knees incredibly weak? I wonder. Why is that?

* * *

**Kokichi**

I feel like I'm constantly suffocating; i've always been so.. confident and conniving, evil and manipulative.. now, I can't even utter a single word without pausing to breathe deeply or stutter. I was naive, thinking that this would all end, the suffering disappearing like the wounds it always left.

But it never did. It always rose back up and ached further - it never ended, and I never bothered to recall the memories I have of when it began. Honestly, it's hard to think about that when all you can register is the pain it brings; one after another, the slabs keep reappearing and falling, crushing me under their weight and letting the blood ooze freely from my body.

I had always wondered what I'd done to deserve this; I had written my own demise on the paper I hid under my pillow, knowing that this was how I would meet it; I'd die by the hands of my greatest enemy, and by the mind of the biggest coward there would ever be - myself.

Life is a maze, you see; at one side, the beginning, it spells 'torture', and at the other, it's 'finally torture'. Death is meaningful, and in so many ways, it brings relief and joy to others. Universally, it's a common denominator; death is the one thing that ties us all together. It connects us in ways that we can't even imagine on our own; it allows us to become closer together.. or further apart.

If you think about it.. has anyone ever **truly** lived? We admire the idea of death - so much so that we struggle to fathom the idea of being alive. For some people, it's so completely _horrible_ that they end it early; suicide comes into play at this point, I guess. Nobody ever truly sees the peril hidden behind another's eyes.

Eyes. They're the windows to the soul, right? Or, at least, that's what I've always heard. Suffering and torment, anxiety and anguish, happiness and delight, fear and pain, enlightenment and desire - they're all things that we can apparently 'see' if we observe someone's eyes for long enough.

Take me as an example, I suppose; my eyes hold memories and secrets that some people may not even begin to be able to comprehend: Metal slabs of immense force and pressure; blood oozing from my corpse: organs leaping from my body as quickly as the machine that stole them: eyes bulging from their sockets: legs becoming like jello: arms melting under the heat.

Maybe, if life wasn't such a whirlwind of emotional blackmail and torture, gripping us with every ounce of its life and refusing to let us go, we may actually be able to live a peaceful life.

 _Peaceful._ What does that word even mean, anyways? The idea of _peace_ in a world of despair, vengeance and loathing is sickening to me. It always has been. How can something as pure and beautiful as peave be derived from something as utterly despairing as destruction?

Sickening. It's always sickening.

* * *

**Kaede**

I feel as though death is always upon me; Creeping from around every corner and edging closer to me with sturdy hands and a disgusting smile, it encloses it's giant appendages around my shaking body and grips me with no end.

Pain isn't _just_ an illusion in a world as unjust as this; it's far more than that. Freedom from it could even be called paradise, if one would prefer the term. Peace is mediocre around here. Can it even be considered that when you still get the occasional scream of sadness in these streets? Can you even attempt to shake the fear instilled into you at youth?

Not everyone has that luxury - that's not even a lie, to be honest. It's just.. the truth. Not everyone has the wit they need to survive out here.

After all, I'm just a murderer now. After killing Rantaro with absolutely no remorse in my mind, I became an empty shell. I really didn't know how to feel anymore. It honestly became **painful** to think about. So, I didn't. 

I gave up on the entire process of remorse; where does remorse ever get you? Nowhere. You can't go back and erase the past, rewriting it so that everyone only ever saw the good in you as opposed to the obvious bad.

Death lurks around every corner; Danganronpa, for example, is the ruler of all death and despair. Ever since Enoshima reclaimed her throne, havoc has run amock and everyone is constantly on edge.

I sometimes wish that I had been strong enough to take my own, miserable, wretched life; I never asked to be a part of this world. I never asked to be alone in my misery - in my suffering and heartache.

But, do our parents ever think about that? What they'll be bringing us in to and what we'll be influenced by? Does everyone have a plan for that?

Maybe a deal with death is easier to contract than one with living. Perhaps that's why I always feel eyes on my back, observing my every moment; maybe that's why I taste disaster at the tip of my tongue with every fibre of my being.

After all, **I used to be one of them. One of those people who had _no faith in humanity._**

I can't speak for anyone else when I say that life is a mission. Most importantly, it's about the journey being perilous and difficult to uphold. I don't want a life like this.

But, my twin is helping me through it. He's my light in this darkness. Maybe, soon enough, I'll be able to feel and think for myself once more.

* * *

**Kaede & Kokichi**

_Why do we exist?_

_To weave the web of death that others before us_

_had wound with such contempt?_

_To laugh at others who try with earnest_

_to end their lives with loathing?_

_To become a tyrant, hated by all, with_

_only a star to guide us?_

_What will we find on this journey of_

_discovery, and why do we have to_

_experience it anyways?_

_Life is a game; we're all pawns_

_on a chess board, waiting to be used_

_and thrown away._

_But I'm okay with that._

_And I know that's strange._


	3. Happiness Comes at a Cost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some things aren't worth living for, and Kokichi can't find one that is.  
> But there are some people that truly deserve the pain you put them through.. and some that don't.

* * *

I didn't mean to make them hurt this bad. I don't think anyone ever intends for pain to affect others so deeply. Wouldn't you feel devastated if you hurt someone you loved?

* * *

**Kaede**

"If you count a shooting star, put it in your pocket and save it for a later date," murmured Maki, standing at my side with the hint of a tiny smile gracing her lips.

"I hear that if you do so, your wishes will undoubtedly come true." Tojo added, a light grin filling her own facial features.

Oddly enough, I feel.. happy, when those two are around me. Like.. I'm on cloud nine, if that makes any sense. It strikes me as something to laugh at, if I'm honest - I remember barely anything from my life before the despair-inducing experience that we all suffered through, yet the one thing I remember..

_Butterflies. They're free to live the way they'd like, and they can fly away without limitations to weigh them down and hold them back; it's not anything to be jealous of, though. They still become limited to one thing - the food chain. Creatures will eventually gobble them up whole, rendering them deceased._

_'That's how I'd like to die if I were ever to join Danganronpa. Butterflies are so beautiful..'_

_The butterfly, with careful precision, swiftly landed on the palm of my hand. I had smiled gently at it before crushing it in my grasp._

_'And yet.. they die so horrifically.'_

* * *

**Kokichi**

For the majority of my life, I'd been alone - meeting Kaede, my dear twin sister, was the one thing that filled me with hope - the one thing that kept me sane. I don't really remember my mother, honestly. She was.. loving, though.. I think.

My father, however? Well, I couldn't forget, no matter how much I wished to in the past.

_"You insolent brat! How dare you stay at school for longer than I permitted?!" Yuso Ouma had screeched at me, his fists meeting my skull with sickening crunches. Each time it made contact, the pain increased; my cries echoed throughout the house, my screams pleading for him to stop and to calm down._

My mother was never around. She never truly cared for me, or so I had supposed. What's even more devastating is the fact that I had been given away in the first place. Whilst Kaede was being treated in plentiful amounts of love and kindness, I was being domestically abused.

Nobody ever came to my rescue. Not until.. not until my mother returned and was filed as deceased due to my father.

_"YUSO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO POOR KOKICHI?"_

_My father's hands stopped their assault rather abruptly, his entire frame beginning to shake with anger._

_"Are you trying to tell me how to discipline **my** child? The brat was late home.. again! What else should I have done?" His voice was deadly calm as his question began to process in the stranger's head. I heard their breath hitch, and I could almost see the frustration radiating off of them in waves._

_"I WAS ON A BUSINESS TRIP. BESIDES, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TREAT HIM IN SUCH A MANNER. HE WAS HOME LATE, SO WHAT? HE HAS A LIFE. HE IS **NOT** YOUR PUPPET, YUSO!"_

_That was the first time that I had ever seen another human-being killed. And what's worse? The murderer had felt no remorse._

* * *

**Kokichi**

"Hey, Ouma, Saihara-" Kaito began, chewing on a chicken drumstick that he had been given by Maki, "What now? The game's over and everythin', so I dunno what we should do next.."

"My name.. isn't Kokichi Ouma.." I murmured quietly, catching the attention of the other three at the neighbouring table, as well as the two people at my own.

"What ever do you mean, Kokichi?" Kirumi had questioned me, her table being positioned right next to ours. She genuinely seemed curious, from what I could tell.

"M-My name is Kokichi Akamatsu, and I'd prefer if you referred to me as such.." I finished, poking at my food with the flimsy, plastic fork I had been given. I soon shoved a piece of pork into my mouth, grimacing at the taste.

"That doesn't matter. You'll be a Momota soon, anyways." Kaito winked jokingly from across the table, almost causing me to choke on the pork I was struggling to chew. My face erupted in colour, my muffled shouts of protest reaching everyone's ears.

I failed to notice the look of jealousy Saihara had shot at us both, and I certainly didn't notice the protective arm that Kaede had placed around my shoulder. Well, at least not straight away.

* * *

**Shuichi**

_I'm not jealous.. I'm not.. I'm not jealous.. not at all.. it's just.. it's just some fun between the two of them.. I should be happy.. I'm not jealous.._

Oh, who am I trying to kid? I'm jealous. I'm completely and utterly, 100% jealous.

But I'm not jealous of those two having fun, per sé. I'm jealous of the fact that.. deep down.. I wish I was part of it, too. Who's to say that I don't want to be married to those two and also have the name Momota and also live in a house with them and wake up cuddled into them and have the opportunity to love them forever and-

Okay, Saihara, you're getting ahead of yourself-

"KOKICHI!" My thoughts were interrupted by a screaming blonde, who had almost ended up choking her brother in a tight hug. The said male started spluttering and begging Kaito for help; Kaito just stared smugly at him, asking him to repeat himself, loud enough for everyone else to hear.

"WE'RE TOO YOUNG TO BE DISCUSSING MARRIAGE, AND I'M 100% STRAIGHT!"

Was that my heart shattering? Yes, yes it was. 

"Well, that's kinda sad then. I'm not exactly straight." Kaito whistled, humming slowly after noticing the crimson hue that took over both Kokichi's face.. and mine. 

"... it's a lie!" He chuckled nervously, averting his timid gaze away from the eyes of both Kaito and myself.

"That's too bad.. I guess I'll just have to ask Makiroll o-"

"NO!" Kokichi's sudden protest must have shocked everyone. But, even so, that was a little bit too loud for it to have come from just him..-

-.. why's everyone staring at me?

"Saihara-chan too..?" I heard the shocked mumbling of Kokichi from his position at the table, and I quickly excused myself. My heart had leapt into my throat by this time, and I could hear the shouts of 'come back!' and 'Saihara!' from everyone else.

"I'm just tired. I'll talk to you all tomorrow!" He called out to them, receiving agreeable murmurs, and excited yet conniving shouts of protest from the two I had been stupid enough to fall for.

* * *

**Kaito**

I'd almost skipped training. Whoops!

I half-expected Makiroll to be the only one who showed, but she wasn't. Shuichi was also there, laughing and joking with Kokichi. Wait, Kokichi? N-Not Makiroll?

I could hear my heart beating even faster at the fact that the two people I had fallen for.. were right in front of me, the moonlight enhancing their natural beauty.

I tried my hardest to calm my ecstatic heart, clearing my throat to alert the two of my presence. Chuckling, I watched as they jumped out of their skin. They turned towards me, immediately relaxing after seeing who it was that had startled them so much.

And so, we spent the rest of the night talking under the light of the moon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking of doing a chapter about the boys' conversation. Whaddya think? ^^


	4. The Web We Weave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The web we weave is a dangerous one - but can we really get away from it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a short chapter that I'm posting whilst I think of the next part of the plot for the next chapter. ^^

* * *

Pain is nothing to me. I don't feel it anymore. Just like that night from so many moons ago.

* * *

They still experienced moments like these, moments where their entire situation seemed too unfathomable.

**The girls had habits of forgetting things..**

Angie would have the occasional moment in which she believed Atua was speaking to her. Kirumi would almost forget that her people didn't exist. Tenko would almost forget that she had no reasonably-kept hate for males. Himiko almost forgot that her magic wasn't real.

Kaede almost forgot that she wasn't a world renowned pianist. Miu almost forgot that she wasn't as vulgar as this beforehand, and that she wasn't an Inventor with unbeatable pride and ambition. Tsumugi almost forgot that she was alive. And Maki? She'd almost forget that the orphanage wasn't real.

**The boys had habits of remembering things too vividly..**

Kokichi would often remember his life from before the simulation - he'd often remember his parents and their behaviour. Shuichi would often remember his 'uncle's' Detective firm, which had actually been fabricated, and love. Kaito would often remember the touch of his grandmother whenever he had a nightmare.Kiibo would often remember Idabashi from all those years ago, back when he was first built.

Ryoma would often remember that he wasn't a criminal. Gonta would often remember that he wasn't able to speak to animals or insects. Rantaro would often remember that he had no-one in this world. And Korekiyo? He'd often remember, then forget, the existence of his sister, who had been fabricated since the very beginning.

* * *

Sometimes, Kaito or Shuichi would catch him with his hands held tightly around his neck; the position he was in would easily allow him to snap the body part in two. He could still feel it at times; the hydraulic press would inch closer and closer to his body, it's silver framework eager to be coated in his blood. His breathing would often quicken as he tried to forget, his hands squeezing unconsciously. Kaito would comfort him. Shuichi, too, would comfort him. **Kokichi Ouma was no scaredy-cat,** **but he'd never felt so terrified.**

Occasionally, Kokichi or Kaito would spot him with his head buried in his hands, his confidence completely disappearing as he stared at himself in the mirror. He'd always see the same thing in its glass; a piano, a corpse, a spikey wall, and a head. It slowly rolled towards him, the eyes of it appearing bloody. The shot-put ball besides it taunted him in his nightmares. **Shuichi Saihara was sure that he was no fool, but now he wasn't so sure.**

At times, Shuichi and Kokichi would identify his figure from inside the hospital, his body hunched over on the grass outside. His fingers would clench the sides of his stomach, accompanying his pain with the need to vomit. His mind would occasionally reroll to the game; blood spewed from his soaked lips as he punched at the dome, trying not to let his tears fall, the realisation of nearing death hitting him harder than any punch ever could. **Kaito Momota was never afraid, but he didn't know if that would stay true for long.**


	5. The Pain We Feel Inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We feel so much pain. It's not fair - but some people don't see it that way.

* * *

You know, we try to avoid pain to the best of our abilities - but sometimes, that just isn't enough.

* * *

**Shuichi**

Kokichi and Kaito are everything to me, really. To some people, such as Kirumi, Maki, and Angie, that much had been obvious since the get-go. Had I been happy to find out that the game was just that- a game? Yes, of course I was. But, I also know that everything comes at a price. In return for their love, I had to give it up.

What did I have to give up, you may ask? The ability to handle certain things _alone._ Unknowingly, to myself, Kokichi used to spot me crying at times, attempting to make myself as small as possible because the _world was scary and this game wasn't fair._ That day, he'd learnt from those obversations - He'd learnt that I couldn't handle my problems, nor my emotions, alone. And, so, he had told Kaito about it.

When they confronted me about it, I ignored them. I tried to keep doing so for over a week, but they just.. they were definitely adamant on getting an answer out of me, that much was for certain. In the end of it all, I broke down in tears, sobbing and weeping as they tried their hardest to comfort me.

Masks. Kokichi had told me about his once, if I recall:

_'Saihara-chan, you can always just do what I do,' Ouma tried his hardest to manifest a smile for me, but even I could see that he was struggling. I was about to offer him some help before I saw his so-called 'Masked Persona' come out to play. He gave me the most cheeky grin his tiny face could muster, 'See? And it's easy to slip on and off.'_

_I gave it a try that day, and needless to say, it wasn't my forté, but I kept trying and trying. Soon enough, I had learnt to master it._

I guess that you could say that my feelings for those two manifested that day. I saw the side of Kokichi that nobody else had ever been allowed to see - the un-guarded, more playful side of him; I got to see the stricter side of Kaito, the one he didn't like showing much at all. It honestly made me feel.. privileged, like they'd preserved their natural selves for me to have the pleasure of seeing.

But now, I feel **happier.**

* * *

"Momota-chan, Saihara-chan, look, look!" Ouma screeched, shoving a plate of something into my hands. Kaito and I looked at each other, shrugging out of pure confusion. We glanced down at the plate that I was currently holding, almost cooing at the sight of Kokichi's adorable grin when we looked back up.

On the plate were 6 apple slices. They weren't just any sort of apple slices, though. They were apple bunny slices.

"I made them all by myself! I didn't even have to get help!" He giggled slightly, Kaede sauntering up from behind him, poised and ready to strike. She pounced on him, not anticipating the squeal she received, and the battle cry that followed.

_Slowly but surely, we were all healing; Akamatsu had found it in herself to be positive again; Kokichi had began to start trying to walk properly again, without the need of support; Kaito had started being a beacon of hope for everyone once more; Yonaga had taken up painting again._

_Yumeno had started trying to learn proper magic tricks; Chabashira had gained some more respect for us; Harukawa was becoming more friendly; Gokuhara was still as interested in bugs as ever; Kiibo was trying to adapt to the fact that he was actually human; Shingūji was trying his hardest to forget about his sister._

_Shirogane had begun to involve herself a little bit more; Tojo had continued to look after them all, but more out of friendship than inclination; Amami had taken to cooking and reading, as well as learning the piano, alongside Kaede; Hoshi had tried to adapt to a normal, 'free' life; I had started to become more outspoken; And, finally, Iruma had started becoming more tolerable._

We were all healing, and that's all any of us could have asked for.


	6. Yesterday will come again - in the form of shooting stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, they can forget what they're fighting for.

* * *

All the stars are closer when I stand beside you, warm and at home and no wonder worrying what I'm to do. Is it wrong to feel that way?

* * *

**Angie**

Honestly, walking around this academy could be so boring at times. They called it a 'recovery facility', but I wasn't blind - this was clearly just something they'd, sooner or later, decide to use against us:

_'we've looked after you as you recovered, you owe us!'_

Though, as hard as it is for me to believe, the others still refused to trust me. Yes, my actions in the game were odd, and yes, I know that Atua wasn't actually real. But, if Team Danganronpa made me that way, then I can't take the blame in that way. I only became what I had been designed as originally.

What we hadn't expected, though, was for our talents to remain in some form within us. For example, I still held my opposition as an artist, and my performance remained outstanding. Kokichi, too, still showed signs of leadership, but it was clear to everyone that he no longer knew how to act on it.

I still remember waking up from the simulation.. the feeling of cold metal shocking my skin, the fear of opening my eyes to yet another killing game, the absolute loss I felt as, for once, Miu finally showed care for somebody besides herself.. right before I was killed.

Blunt force trauma is.. much less painful than I'd ever read about in story books. I had always been under the impression that it'd be as painful as all-get-out, that it'd be paralysing and fearing as you lay there, slowly bleeding onto your brain. 

But it wasn't like that at all. It was quick, painless. Almost comforti-

 _'No, Yonaga, snap out of it.'_ Slapping both of my hands against my boney-cheeks, I sped up my walking by a smidgen.

Please, get me out of here alive.

* * *

**Kokichi**

Kaito sat besides me, slurping up some ramen noodles that Kirumi had prepared for him. At times, I still didn't feel like I was really alive. Yes, sure, the fact that I was breathing was a start to believing that, but it didn't feel like I should be able to do what I can now.

I shouldn't be able to walk - so they put me in a wheelchair, yet I can walk slowly with support, or Saihara-chan will occasionally have to carry me. It's not fair.

I get it - it was my plan, after all, to unite everyone against a common enemy to ensure the defeat of the mastermind, but I didn't want to die the way I did. My death was traumatising, causing me to have psychological issues.

Tsumugi compares it to 'partial amnesia' due to my ability of forgetting everything. I wonder.. what would have happened if I'd never awoken to begin with-

"'Kichi? You okay there, man?" Momota nudged me, eliciting a laugh from Saihara at my squeak of surprise. 

I gave him a quick nod, poking around at my food with these annoying plastic forks.

Momota just continued to stare at me, almost as if he knew I was lying. With Saihara, however, there was no 'if', he definitely knew. He had no problem voicing that, either, considering the confidence he'd been building since the simulation had ended.

"Ouma-kun, we aren't stupid. Why aren't you eating? You haven't eaten a single meal in the last week. A day longer and you'll.."

_Metal slab._

_Closer. Closer. Inching closer._

_Blood spurting._

_Everything is pink._

_Bathing in death._

_Closer, still-_

I slammed my hands down on the surface of the table, my breathing quickening at a rapid pace. My eyes darted around for a second, noticing the startled expressions of the people at the table with us. _  
_

"Y-You think I-.. i-I'm just.. not hungry." Hair shadowing my eyes, I pushed my food to the other side of the table, settling for plucking a small bunch of carrots from the draws in the kitchen. It took a little while to wheel myself in, but a sudden pain resounded in my head, causing my grip on the carrots to loosen.

"Ouma-kun, are you okay?" Saihara called out. I opened my mouth slowly, ready to answer him, but nothing came out. Instead, black spots invaded my vision and, for a moment, they cleared up enough to see my body tumbling out of my wheelchair, becoming a tousled mess on the floor.

I don't remember anything after that.

* * *

**Shuichi**

"Ouma-kun, are you okay?" God, he was sickly pale, so thin and boney.. I fear that if Momota tried to pick him up, he'd snap him like a twig.

I never got a response, only a body tumbling out of the kitchen. 

"Ouma-kun!" I shouted, rather loudly, mind you. The body didn't move, nor did I receive a response, just like last time.

"This.. isn't normal.." Kirumi was by his side in an instant, checking him over. Now, we didn't think it was possible to have wounds transfer from the simulator into our actual lives, but it actually can happen.

Kokichi knows that first-hand, as it was the injuries he carried over that caused him to wake up last.

The blood dripping from his head surely didn't disprove my original thoughts; I ordered Kirumi to, as quickly as possible, get me some bandages, and then rush Ouma to the medical bay in the facility.

Nodding, she did as requested, hastily darting out of the room as though her life depended on her every move. 

"This has got to be to do with the injuries he carried over.." I mused, speed-walking to the infirmary with Momota by my side. He nodded in agreement, humming.

* * *

In terms of injuries, my eyes were scarred and had to be fixed up with small surgeries here and there; Himiko only had a few cuts on her head and legs; Maki had minor abrasions here and there.

The survivors got the best of it.. the victims got the worst, which Tsumugi had claimed 'was to be expected'.

Kokichi had been unable to walk, his ankles broken, back tousled out of place, which had to be fixed with countless surgeries, and skin graphs were used to replace dead and bloodied patches of torn skin. Yonaga had a few dents in her head from that floorboard that had killed her. Shingūji had melted patches of skin and his brain was slightly affected.

Chabashira's nape would occasionally bleed, almost killing her in the process, due to the sickle that had caused the wound. Gokuhara would constantly throw up blood and vomit, the hole in his stomach still feeling.. present, in his words. Momota's mind was still convinced that his body was sick, physically and mentally, causing him problems with athletics. 

Akamatsu occasionally thought that she was suffocating, her hands finding her neck more often than she'd like. Amami had the same problem as Yonaga, due to them both dying of blunt force trauma. Iruma would often have the same problem as Akamatsu, as, again, they both suffered similar fates. Kirumi would get sudden inklings of pain and blood pouring out of her body from various places, which, at times, could leave her immobile for days.

Ryoma would sometimes feel as though he was drowning, his wind pipe having to be expanded with countless surgeries. Kiibo struggled to keep his food down, his immune system rejecting anything and everything due to the fact that his mind was tricked into believing that he was a robot, that he didn't need food to function. Shirogane, however, came out relatively unharmed, suffering far less pain from her blunt force trauma-induced death than Yonaga and Amami combined.

* * *

"Kokichi-kun, I need you to stay still for me, okay?" I whispered as quietly as I possibly could, receiving a hesitant nod in return. He winced upon feeling the luke-warm bandages embracing his head. Momota held his hand from the side, letting Kokichi lean into him.

"Okay.. and we're all done," After several minutes of tying bandages, I was finally done. As I voiced that, I had noticed that Kokichi had gone limp, body and mind taken over by utter exhaustion. With a small, hesitant smile, I noticed that Kaito, too, had also fallen asleep.

With a sigh, I let sleep take me over, too. Atua knows I needed the rest..


	7. Who We Used To Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, if I close my eyes, I remember how disgusting the old me used to be.
> 
> It's sickening, isn't it?

**He used to love Danganronpa.**

He loved everything about it, from the sickeningly-pink blood that would swipe across the screen as an execution ended, to the way the mastermind was always so eager to see their participants die.

His favourite character had always been the Ultimate Detective, Kyoko Kirigiri. He'd met her once before, before he became too corrupted for his own tastes, and she had given him a tiny grin that set his own heart racing, thighs trembling with excitement, despite knowing that it was fake.

Kyoko Kirigiri's smiles were always plastic, he knew that since the start. During the first season, of what had been dubbed Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, he'd paid attention to the lack of motivation and charisma that seemed to envelop the group. It wasn't until the first body discovery announcement had occurred that he'd been even remotely interested.

Watching them all get along was boring in it's own right, their cheerful laughter and those few moments of solace were few and far between. 

When it came to the 52nd season, he realised something; he looked at his clock, the application time only 1 minute away from starting. With a slightly gleaming smile, his finger hovering over the 'submit' button, Shuichi found himself hesitating. 

Would he be missed if he suddenly died on a game show that his family, near and far, vastly hated with a burning passion?

No, he figures, after a moment of intense thinking. His thoughts needn't be monologued - the first Ultimate Detective to become a blackened - he wasn't important enough to have his thoughts recorded and remembered for anyone to hear at a later date.

No, for Shuichi, remaining alive wasn't as important as joining Danganronpa - he had no friends, no carers, no parents who loved him unconditionally. The world around him was just as fake as the Ultimate Detective.

And so, he decided, why stay in a plastic world?

In the end, auditioning for Danganronpa was the one thing that tore his mind to shreds. Shuichi Saihara, the Ultimate Dangan-Fanboy, had been no more once the series had begun anew. There was no blood-loving psycho anymore, only the hollowed-out shell of a boy who had never learnt to love, nor how to let go.

Danganronpa was meant to have been his escape - his way out of all the pain and dread in his mind. Unfortunately, it hadn't been that at all, nor anything remotely akin to it.

Returning to his old highschool, to continue his schooling, of course, wasn't nearly as pleasant as he had hoped it would be. Stomach churning, he had stepped into the building with shaky legs and jittery feet; Conversations stopped abruptly as everyone turned to the face the former fanboy that they had all become sick of so long ago.

Or so Saihara had thought..

As people hurried in his direction, questions about his experience in the game chucked at him with sadistic grins, Saihara had to cover his mouth; he felt the bile about to peel his fingers apart, about to break through and splatter everywhere, just like--

As green liquid covered the floor in which he stood, Saihara made the hasty decision to run away.

Oh, how he regretted being alive.

* * *

**He remembered despising Danganronpa.**

He hated everything about it, from the way the characters murdered one another, seemingly without remorse, to the way that they threw wrongfully-intrigued glances to the bear who had started it all.

However, despite that, he managed to find a bit of hope in the series. After all, the game had allegedly been a series of cat and dog; hope always prevailed over despair, but despair would always bite back. It was like a never-ending chase, that, in the end, always seemed to have been fruitless.

Naegi Makoto and Komaeda Nagito had been his favourites ever since their respective games had been released on both TV and PS Vita. Makoto was always shining and full of wonder and hope, something Ouma had always respected. Komaeda, in a sense, was just as crazy as he was for preferring hope over despair, love over war, happiness over tragedy. He'd try to keep the group as hopeful as possible in his own, twisted ways.

Sure, it resulted in the him having to isolate himself because he tried to kill Imposter for his own sick ways of inducing hope, but Ouma had always respected and admired his blunt statements and mysterious persona.

But, as his finger hovered over the submit button, he found himself hesitating. Danganronpa V3 was what he had wanted to sign up for for as long as he could remember; it was like watching water extinguish an electrical fire. It was trying its hardest to put it out, but the fire still stood strong regardless. Thoughts whirled through his mind relentlessly, and he couldn't push them out. Try as he might, they kept coming back stronger than ever.

His finger wavered.

_Would he be missed? Would his mother be committed to watching him die, or would she finally put down the bottle and open up her arms? Would his father watch on as he committed himself to a game of deathly despair, or would he finally be proud of him for doing something he never thought he could, nor would?_

No - he tried to reason with himself - why on earth would they care now if they never did before?

As it would happen, the game itself was just as horrible as Kokichi had imagined it would be. Everyone had hated him; he'd become the villain who had manipulated Gonta and sent both him and Miu to their demise. He'd been told by Shuichi Saihara, the Ultimate Detective himself, that 'he was alone' and 'he always would be', because 'everyone else had Kaito', and 'he had no-one'.

Although he didn't win, and although he had no recollection of the person he was before, he found himself being a fan favourite. Not just of their season, but of the entire series. Surely, he thought, the viewers in the outside world wouldn't be that crazy over his shameful persona.

It appeared that, yet again, he was wrong.

The only three people who had even stuck by Kokichi in his agony were Amami Rantaro, Idabashi Kiibo and Akamatsu Kaede. They were a strange group, comprised of an optimist who remained as happy as she possibly could be in the face of despair, an adventurer who kept most things to himself, a boy who had never felt loved and would never know what such a thing felt like, and a male of whom didn't function properly due to the robot they had turned him into.

Stepping into their old school caused a ruckus, to say the least; fans flooded them from right to left. He caught a glimpse of a stranger in a hat dashing off to get away from the crowd, and he immediately chased after them, forgetting to tell his group of his find.

* * *

_And if you dare to ask Kokichi about what he'd seen that day, his response would always be:_

_'The boy who lied straight to my face - the one I loved anyways.'_

_And Shuichi, you ask?_

_'The boy who never opened up - the phantom of lies - the one I loved anyways.'_

**Author's Note:**

> I have a set schedule for upload dates now. I'll be posting that later on this week or next week. Until then, see you! 🎶


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